If you’re looking for true examples of core values in action, let me show you what happens when you ignore them.
I was on the floor of my stylish apartment, surrounded by the trappings of what I was supposed to want. The high-paying job, the designer handbag, the curated Instagram feed. And I was sobbing.
Because it all felt like a costume. A heavy, itchy costume I was wearing for an audience I didn’t even like.
Sound familiar? That was the day I finally understood that I was living by a checklist written by society, my family, and my own insecurities. I was running a race I never signed up for.
The turning point? Ditching the shoulds and getting brutally honest about my core values.
Forget vague definitions. Your core values are your personal, non-negotiable principles. They are the feelings, principles, and states of being that make you feel alive, authentic, and at peace. When you honor them, life flows. When you betray them, you think that soul-deep friction—the burnout, the anxiety, the is this all there is?
This isn’t about finding a list of pretty words. It’s about finding your life’s cheat code. Let’s stop overcomplicating it and find yours.
Beyond the Buzzword: What Core Values Actually Feel Like
Your personal core values aren’t abstract concepts floating around in self-help books. They’re visceral experiences that show up in your daily life.
Instead of saying core values guide your decisions, let’s get real: Your core values are the reason you felt drained after that fun party (because you value depth over surface-level socializing) and why you spent your Saturday building a birdhouse instead of brunching (because you value creation over consumption).
Think about what makes you feel proudest. What makes you irrationally angry? What do you secretly crave when you’re daydreaming?
If you want to go deeper, I found The Values Factor by Dr. John Demartini to be a game-changer. He explains how our brain’s reticular activating system is literally wired to spot opportunities that align with our values. Reading it helped me understand this wasn’t just fluffy self-help—it’s practical neurobiology.
Your values are the reason certain decisions feel effortless while others leave you second-guessing everything. They’re why some goals energize you and others feel like pushing a boulder uphill.
Real-World Examples of Core Values in Action
Let’s move beyond generic lists of core values and see what they actually look like in different parts of your life.
Examples of Core Values in the Workplace
If you value AUTONOMY: You’d rather have a flexible deadline and the freedom to figure it out yourself than be micromanaged through every step. You thrive in roles where you can set your own schedule and choose your methods.
If you value IMPACT: You’ll choose the job where you can see how your work helps a real person, even if the title is less glamorous. You’d pick teaching over investment banking if it means making a difference.
If you value GROWTH: You’ll volunteer for the challenging project that stretches your skills, even if it’s outside your job description. You see setbacks as learning opportunities rather than failures.
If you value STABILITY: You prefer consistent routines and predictable outcomes. You’d choose the steady corporate role over the exciting startup that might fold in six months.
For more inspiring stories that bring values to life, the Pass It On campaign offers a beautiful collection of real-world examples.
Examples of Core Values in Relationships
If you value AUTHENTICITY: You feel safe in a relationship where you can share your weird, unfiltered thoughts without judgment. Small talk drains you, but deep conversations energize you.
If you value LOYALTY: A partner who shows up for you, not just in the good times but when you’re a mess, is non-negotiable. You’d rather have one ride-or-die friend than a dozen fair-weather ones.
If you value PLAYFULNESS: You prioritize silly inside jokes and spontaneous dance parties in your living room over always having serious dates. Laughter is your love language.
If you value COMPASSION, you’re drawn to people who show kindness to servers, patience with children, and empathy for struggling coworkers. Mean-spirited humor makes you uncomfortable.
Personal Values Examples for Students and Beyond
If you value CURIOSITY: Your perfect Saturday involves a deep dive into a random Wikipedia hole or trying a recipe from a cuisine you can’t pronounce. You ask why and how more than most people.
If you value SIMPLICITY: You feel more energized after cleaning out your closet than after a shopping spree. Minimalism appeals to you because stuff feels like clutter to your soul.
If you value ADVENTURE: You’d rather spend money on experiences than things. The unknown excites rather than terrifies you.
If you value SERVICE: You feel most fulfilled when helping others, whether that’s volunteering, mentoring, or simply being the friend people call in crisis.
The No-BS 3-Step Guide to Finding Your Values
Your values aren’t hiding in some mysterious place. They’re right there in your experiences, waiting to be recognized.
Step 1: The Peak & Pit Reflection
Grab your journal. Don’t overthink it.
The Peak: Write about 2-3 moments you felt genuinely, deeply happy and fulfilled. What were you doing? What was the underlying feeling? Was it the connection? The achievement? The freedom?
Maybe it was the time you helped your friend move and felt useful. Maybe it was when you finished a creative project and felt proud. Maybe it was a quiet moment in nature that brought you peace.
The Pit: Now, write about 2-3 moments that left you feeling resentful, drained, or angry. What value was being trampled on? Feeling micromanaged? Your autonomy was violated. Forced to gossip? Your authenticity was compromised.
Step 2: The Word Vomit Brain Dump
Look at your reflections from Step 1. Now, browse a core values list (a quick Google search will bring up hundreds). Your job is to be a magnet, not a critic. Without judging, write down every single word that sparks a flicker of recognition—even if it feels silly or contradictory. Aim for 15-20.
Don’t worry if some seem contradictory (like both adventure and security). You are exploring, not committing yet.
Step 3: The Hell Yes! Filter
This is the key. Look at your list. For each word, ask: Is this a Hell Yes! or a Kinda, I guess?
Your gut knows. The words that make you feel a sense of calm, excitement, or rightness are your true north.
Narrow it down to your top 3. Three is powerful, memorable, and forces you to identify what’s truly non-negotiable.
From Insight to Action: Using Your Values as Your Superpower
Knowing your values is useless if you don’t use them. Here’s how to turn insight into action.
The Decision-Making Filter
Faced with a choice? Hold it up against your top 3 values. Does this option honor at least one of them? If not, it’s probably a no.
Should you take that promotion that requires 70-hour weeks? If you value family time, probably not. If you value achievement and growth, maybe yes.
The Boundary Setter
If peace is a core value, you now have permission to leave chronically chaotic situations. That’s not being rude; it’s being loyal to yourself.
Your values give you the language to explain your choices without over-explaining or apologizing.
The Goal-Setting Compass
Instead of getting a promotion, a value-driven goal is to find a role that values my creativity. This shifts you from chasing titles to chasing fulfillment.
Instead of losing 20 pounds, try building a strong, healthy body if you value vitality. The how becomes clearer when the why aligns with who you are.
Living Your Values Daily
Your values aren’t just for big life decisions. They guide the small choices that add up to your life’s direction.
If you value learning, you might choose podcasts over music during your commute. If you value connection, you might put your phone away during dinner. If you value creativity, you might wake up 20 minutes early to write or sketch.
Your Permission Slip to Live Authentically
You don’t need anyone’s permission to want what you want. Your core values aren’t up for debate. They are the DNA of your soul.
You might value stability in a world that glorifies hustle. You might value solitude in a culture that worships connection. You might value compassion in an environment that rewards ruthlessness.
That doesn’t make you wrong. It makes you uniquely you.
So take this as your official permission slip. Use these examples of core values as a starting point, then give yourself permission to stop following a map that leads to someone else’s destination. Your values are your compass, and they’ve been pointing toward your authentic life all along.
The life that feels like a perfect fit—not a borrowed costume—is waiting for you to claim it.